Hei juttele sinä vaan

Juliaihminen

Vaikka toissapäivänä rageilin erään ilkeän setämiehen törkykäytöksestä, niin oikeastihan suurin osa ihmsistä suhtautuu tosi kivasti lapsiin ja äitiyslomalaisiin. Ja itse asiassa yksi paras juttu tässä äikkärillä on se, että olen päässyt tuntemattomille horisemisen makuun! Musta on viimein tullut se hieman kylähullun oloinen muija, joka jutustelee kevään tulosta, kehuu random-seniorin vetokärryjen kaunista kukkakuviota ja päivittelee ratikoiden myöhästymistä traktorimielenosoituksen takia satunnaisen kaupunkilaisen kanssa. 

 

Yksi syy tähän on se, että liikun kaupungilla sellaiseen aikaan, että muutkin ihmiset ovat siellä kiireettömiä. Toisin sanoen vanhukset, lattemamat ja -papat, opiskelijat, juopot tai rokulipäivää viettävät. Kiireettömät ihmiset ovat hyväntuulisia, ja hyväntuulisuus lisää juttelualttiutta.

Toiseksi mä olen tehnyt oikein päätöksen, että alan semmoseksi tuntemattomille-horisija-muijaksi. Jubailtiin nimittäin siskon kanssa, että halutaan kasvattaa lapsistamme semmosia, että ne ajattelee maailman olevan avoin ja ihmisten olevan hyvätahtoisia, ja että ketä vain voi lähestyä kivasti. Eikä riitä, että vain sanoo, että näin on. Pitää näyttää esimerkkiä kommentoimalla ratikkapysäkillä katupölyn määrää tai sitä, miten kahvin juominen ulkona on paljon kivempaa kuin sisällä. Toisin sanoen, horista turhia ja just siksi niin merkityksellisiä asioita. 

(Tähän väliin pitää tosin sanoa, että joskus etenkin vanhojen papparaisten näennäisesti hyväntahtoiset jutustelupyrkimykset vähän ontuvat. Kuten eilen, kun semmonen suomenruotsalaisukkeli kommentoi liikennevaloissa kaverini vaunuissa nukkuvaa lasta: "Eikös se ollutkaan kuollut?" Ööö, miten tähän pitäisi reagoida?! Kommentoimalla, että taidat itse olla lähempänä hautaa kuin tuo 1-vuotias?)

 

Joskus on kuitenkin tilanteita, joissa ei voi kommentoida ystävällisesti, vaikka kuinka kovasti haluaisi. Viime perjantaina me lähdettiin Tikin kanssa neljän maissa iltapäivällä perheemme perinteiselle toivioretkelle Hermannin (fanttastiseen) Lidliin. Meidän talon edessä seisoi nainen, joka oli laskenut kauppakassinsa maahan ja Upcider-tölkin roskiksen päälle. Se sihautti tölkin auki ja sytytti tupakan. 

Vähän matkan päässä alettiin jutella Tikin kanssa ja huomattiin, että oltiin molemmat tehty sama ajatusketju: Olipa sillä naisella jotenkin kahdehdittavan hyvä meininki! Just tuommonen on täydellinen tapa aloittaa viikonloppu raskaan duuniputken jälkeen. Teki mieli kommentoida tälle naiselle, että noin sitä pitää ja jatka samaan malliin! Mutta sitten molemmat oltiin pähkäilty mielessämme, että ilmaisi tämän asian miten tahansa, se kuulostaisi vittuilulta, kun se tulee lastenvaunuja kärräävän pariskunnan suusta. ("Senkin juoppolalli, siinä sitä vaan dokaillaan kun me vietetään tervehenkistä Lidliin-meno-elämää perheen kesken!")

Näin ollen äitiysloma on myös sulkenut multa pois tiettyjä jutustelumahdollisuuksia.

 

Kuvassa vauva, joka on täydellinen conversation piece.

(Tiesittekö muuten, että conversation piece tarkoittaa paitsi esinettä, josta saa aloitettua jutunjuurta, myös ryhmäpotrettimaalausta, jossa kiinnostavat ihmiset esittävät keskustelevansa toistensa kanssa. Tällaisia maalattiin 1700-luvulla. Opin tämän seikan tänään, kun olin viettämässä lattemamaelämää Kiasmassa. Huomaatteko muuten, etten horise tajunnanvirtaa pelkästään ratikassa, vaan myös ihan täällä blogissakin!)

 

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