”Käytä aurinkovoidetta”, eli elämänviisautta vaippaikäiselle

Eddien Lontoon-nimiäisissä kummatäti P luki hänelle tämän Muumipeikon tervetulotoivotuksen (Tove Janssonin tekstin pohjalta englanniksi riimitellyt Sophie Hannah):

’Welcome home, Moomin, safe and sound!
And welcome, friends! Come, gather round!’
What a relief it is to tell
a tale that ends supremely well, 
where lovely Moominmamma sat
collecting berries in a hat.
’Time for a feast,’ said Mamma. ’Drink!’
Scrumptious delights all round, I think.
A shell, a rose, a fresh baked bun?
’Oh, I’m so glad to see my son,
and gorgeous milk! There’s milk galore!’
Now guess what happens, just once more.

*****

Eddien kummasetä W taas luki hänelle Mary Schmichin elämänohjeita yliopistosta valmistuville:

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they’ll be gone for good. 

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will lie. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.