Writing a new post took way much longer than I thought. I found it more comfortable to post pictures and short greetings to my Instagram @mushy_gushy_life than finding the time to write here. Last months have been full of action, hope, disappointment, stress and big meaningful occasions, like the birth of my lovely beloved daughter.

As I am writing this, I spent the evening alone with the kids. My husband went to work and after the chores, cooking, play time, shower and evening snack for the first born aka Roadrunner, I am having my ”own time” at least for an hour or two before the baby wakes up to eat again. So I put on an moisturising face mask, I am milking with this vacuum milker on one breast and machine pumping the other one to store some milk and to boost the amount of my breast milk. Stress has caused a decline in my milk production.

Yes, I would describe my life a bit hectic at the moment! When I posted my first post here, we were arranging our family to move to UK. We already sold most of our belongings here in Finland, arranged the firstborn’s matters ready for him to start the pre school in the new environment and rented out an apartment in Liverpool. Then came the second wave of Corona and made all our effort empty. My spouse’s visa application is still stuck in the UK visa center and now Brexit will make it very difficult for us to move to UK later. Also, my firstborn will start school this coming autumn, so we will most likely stay in Finland now, against our plan and will. It would just be unfair to our son to toss him around to a different country and totally new culture, and school system later on.

So a lot has happened in the past six months. After a lot of arranging on the practical things, sorting our clothes and selling our furnitures too cheap, going through all the old papers and other things I stored in the cellar (20 years of my life stuff) we just had to admit to ourselves that the dream we both had was not going to happen at least for now. We wanted to make our life and future a bit easier in a more international environment with better opportunities. Especially for my spouse who is not a native Finnish speaker and did not find it so easy to find a decent job here. All the hard work and plans we made, the nice rental apartment with affordable rent we managed to get and already paid for, had to let go. We had to switch our brains to a new mindset to stay in Finland, find a new apartment here, arrange my firstborn’s pre school, doctors appointments, find him new therapists and also for me to prepare my mind and body for the labour ahead. Have to say, things could have been so much smoother, I really wish they would have,but you play with the cards you got, and somehow we managed to settle all these things, tackle the issues and we are still married! I tell you, there were times we almost gave up along the way.

Now I am going to chill before going to sleep. Hubby came home and surprised me with an alcohol-free beer, my fav brand.